A Voice That Cries In The Dark : My story about depression

Rest In Peace Mindy McCready and Don Cornelius

I am sharing my personal story about my battle with depression. There are a lot of people going through depression. According to NAMI, about 1 and 10 americans suffered from some form of depression. The sad part is about more than half don’t recieve the proper care they need. Here is my story I hope it will help someone else. If you would like to share your story please email me at TiffanyReneeBlogs@gmail.com. For information about depression please visit NAMI.ORG.  Love you

Rest In Peace Mindy McCready and Don Cornelius.

“I Won’t Let This Commercialism Ruin My Christmas” Tiff’s Christmas Story

“I Won’t Let This Commercialism Ruin My Christmas”

Tiff’s Christmas Story


            As a little girl, I have always enjoyed Christmas and the spirit that surrounds it. People seem to be little bit nicer and kinder to each other during the holidays. This is a time in your own unique way can show your Christmas spirit towards each other. I had a ritual around Christmas time that I stick to this day. I had to see the following Christmas movies; Charlie Brown’s Christmas, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, Christmas Story( you’ll shoot your eye out), and National Lampoon Christmas Vacation. I always loved the Charlie Brown’s Christmas story because of the message behind. While everyone was caught up in the materialistic side of Christmas, Charlie Brown stuck to the true meaning of Christmas by having a little bitty Christmas tree. As he stated, “I won’t let all this commercialism ruin my Christmas.” I think me and Charlie Brown could agree. Honestly, I think people have forgotten the true meaning of Christmas. Instead, we are fighting for the last flat screen television and knocking someone out for it (Sorry Manny Pacquiao…) during black Friday.  This is a time we spend with our families and share in the joy of the holiday. Moreover, we give back to the children and families who are not able to have anything under the tree and on the table. In my belief system, I believe that we are the hands and feet of God and if you have done to least of them, you have also paid honor to him. I know during the time of the immense fiscal cliff, where people have no jobs, losing homes, and sometimes losing their hope and faith it is hard to smile. I know personally in 2012 I have gone through a lot. Despite of it all, I still smile.  I have been through a lot such as

  • Losing two family members (grandmother and uncle) to some form of cancer.
  • Having a best friend of mine constantly going in and out of the hospital.
  • The frustration of college graduate and not being able to find a job in her field and living off one income
  • Being unemployed (everyone can agree with that)
  • Dealing me and my husband mental health.

This year alone I have been diagnosed with moderate depression and there were times I could not get out of bed. Instead, I would take sleeping pills and hang up dark curtains in my windows to block out the sunshine. I had so many negative thoughts and even doubted my faith. As Christian, this walk gets so hard that even you lose your faith in God. Imagine me, I was singing in choir pretending to have it all together but falling apart day by day. I became a moving zombie with no emotions, dreams or aspirations. Until one day, there was a ray of light shine through my dark tomb I built of shame, disappointment, and personal failure. Day by Day I climbed and pressed my way through past what I was feeling.  Now, I am grateful I have overcome depression with joy, peace, clarity and hunger for infinite wisdom.  Even though, I don’t have as much I am truly grateful for living and ability to tell my story to you. Even though the situation around you looks grim, I have hope in the fact over the mountain there is sunshine. I’m sure it gets hard to climb but keep pushing through. The most important thing I learn is you are not only one going through it.  There is someone else who has been where you are and can provide words of wisdom to help you.

How can you make this Christmas better for you???

  • Be appreciative of things you do have.

Reflect on the positive things in your life and hope for better things to come.

  • Be Proactive in your community

Try to volunteer at a homeless shelter, give a toy to a child, or donate to worthy cause. Charity is the greatest gift you can give to another.

  • Forgive and Let It Go

Unforgiveness is like carrying a building on your back. It gets heavy, makes you angry all the time and clouds your judgment.

The greatest gift you can give to yourself is to forgive someone who hurt you. Trust me it is not for them but it is for you. You can write a letter or send a Christmas card afterwards put it out your mind and move on .

  • Spend time with the ones you love

This is time where family is important and the centerpiece of the holiday. Take the time out and spend with your family especially the elder members because you never know if this Christmas will be their last.

  • Give a hug

Shock the hell out of someone you can’t stand and give them hug. See their reaction. Invoke your positive spirit into them. If they ask, you just stay, “ It’s looks like you need one.”


In conclusion, make this Christmas a good one for you and the people around by staying positive. I hope one Christmas day, people can share the love and get back to true meaning of Christmas.  I leave you words from my favorite Christmas song by  Steve Wonder


Someday at Christmas there’ll be no wars
When we have learned what Christmas is for
When we have found what life’s really worth
There’ll be peace on earth

Someday all our dreams will come to be
Someday in a world where men are free
Maybe not in time for you and me
But someday at Christmastime

Someday at Christmas we’ll see a land
With no hungry children, no empty hand
One happy morning people will share
Our world where people care

Someday at Christmas there’ll be no tears
All men are equal and no men have fears
One shining moment, one prayer away
From our world today

Someday all our dreams will come to be
Someday in a world where men are free
Maybe not in time for you and me
But someday at Christmastime

I dedicated this story my angel who still watches over me to this day and she taught me the true meaning of Christmas. Even though on December 15th leaves a damper on my heart, I know we are never apart. I love you Grandma