Last night, I was out with my husband when my phone and facebook messages were blowing up about the MTV Video Music Awards. The VMA was held in Brooklyn, which is the home of several hip-hop artists. I was poised to see what was about to happen. All the years of watching the VMA, there were so many great moments to have been seen and talked about for years to come. I expected nothing more than the best.
Lady Gaga got back!!!!!
The show opened up with Lady Gaga performing her new single “Applause”. She was dressed in this all white, nun-like costume. Throughout the performance, she was changing into different costumes. I don’t know if anyone noticed but her background dancers was werqing it (translation: working it). When Gaga turned around, she had ass ass ass ass. Probably to everyone else, this extra weight is a bad thing but, to me, I was like, you go girl. The rumor mill began to spread saying she got butt shots like Nikki Minaj. She gained extra weight. I think Lady Gaga looks amazing. She is embracing her curves for the girls. Lady Gaga, keep doing what you doing mama and I can’t wait until your album comes out.
WTF Lil Kim
For some who don’t know, I am huge Lil Kim fan. I was a fan since she was on the Junior Mafia track, “Get Money”. She is the whole reason why Nikki Minaj exists and is relevant today. Yeah, I said it. I remember Kim as a really cute girl but, last night, she looked different. She looked very clay-like to me. I don’t know how much plastic surgery she had but it needs to stop now, today, and forever. I respect Kim as a hip-hop artist because she was the first female artist to build an international market, based on her music. I’m just saying, Kim, please stay away from the table and go back to making good music again.
Miley…you in trouble girl
I guess Miley Cyrus has some daddy or boyfriend issues because lately she has been turnt up. Ever since her furry loving twerking video debuted on YouTube, she has deemed herself has the twerking queen with no ass. The whole art of twerking is to show off your ass, but she doesn’t have any. When she twerks, I can see nothing but her spinal cord moving. What the hell?? She came out looking like Vera, from In Living Color, with this tan two-piece on, with her ass cheeks hanging out. She thought sticking out her tongue is sexy. It’s not sexy, but it’s an extremely slutty act for advertisement. It shows free advertisement that you can give large amounts of head to anyone. Her performance was a freak show of stuffed animals and big booty girls. Then, Robin Thicke came out. (Let us all take a moment of silence for his suit.) Robin, why did you think wearing that Beetlejuice suit was sexy? Whoever picked that out for you needs to have several seats in back. He was singing “Blurred Lines” and then Miley came and backed her boney butt on him like she was Diamond, from the Players Club, asking for ten dollars. I don’t know if anyone else noticed, but he got hard and was poking through his pants. I was thinking to myself, “Paula is going to kill both of them.” The good thing about this performance was seeing Kendrick Lamar perform and 2Chains brung the Whitehaven/Westwood majorettes (Memphis reference!) on stage. In all, this performance was not a performance, but a freak show, flurry lover fantasy. Robin and Miley, you got to do better.
Kanye, So Far Gone
Excuse me for a moment; this is out of my character. WHAT THE FUCK……YEESUS?? This week we finally see baby North West’s picture on Kris Jenner’s failing talk show. Baby North looks really cute and papa Kanye was proud. I could not understand his performance. He was in the shadows rapping about… I don’t know. I do believe ever since his mother, Donta West, passed away Kanye West has not been the same. To me, his first three albums were the best but after those, they are all shit. I’m going to say it: Kanye West’s performance sucked. He should have stayed at home with Kim and North…..watching the show from a far.
The Justin Timberlake Show!!!!!!!!
Justin Timberlake received the Video Vanguard Award this year and when he performed…… LAWD.
I was so far gone, like any Justin Timberlake fan would be. He started his performance with his new single, “Take Back the Night”, which is sampled from a Michael Jackson cut off his Off The Wall album. Then, JT took us all the way back with the songs we loved. He didn’t sing most of the time because some of his fans were singing the lyrics for him, including me and my girl, Natasha. I was extremely blown away. Just when I thought the performance couldn’t get any better, what did he do? He performed with NSYNC… ahhhhhhhhhh! At this point, I was laid out on the floor like my edges, when I get a fresh perm. I was laid like I was at a Michael Jackson concert in 1992. NSYNC was the group I truly adored when I was in high-school. At that moment, I felt like Tiffany from late 1999, with my Fubu overalls, Timberland boots and cornrows, with extensions. It was a stellar performance by Justin and, after that, he claimed that night as his show…….. The Justin Timberlake experience.
By The Way……..Honorable Mentions(What I noticed during the show.)
Drake……. looked sad like someone stole his puppy.
Rihanna……… looking like ok I am here, where is my blunt?
Taylor Swift ………. if Kanye gets up, this moon man is going up side his head.
Selena Gomez…… I’m here with my BFF, forget Justin.
Bruno Mars……performed my favorite song, “Gorilla” with an awesome laser beam light show.
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis…… Used their award as a platform to promote equal rights for gay couples *round of applause*
Kate Perry…. The song was good but she definitely had to lip sync for her life. In all, the performance, to me, was flat.
Kevin Hart and Jimmy Fallon…. They are still the best hosts for the VMA and should consider hosting together.
Kendrick Lamar… He was cooler than Freddie Jackson sipping a milkshake in a snow storm.